Last week, I was fortunate enough to take a tour of the Philadelphia Phillies baseball park with some of my colleagues from work. The tour route is everywhere you can't go without being a Phillies employee or being very wealthy. They take you down to the field, the dugouts, the executive suites, etc. All of which is very interesting.
The part of the tour that caught most of my attention was a spot on the wall in between the press box and the radio booth. On the wall were two posters with a list of rules. One of them I don't recall what it said. But the other was a list of rules regarding pacing of the game.
This was fascinating stuff, like how the pitcher has 12 seconds to throw the ball once the batter is in the batter's box. Who knew? Not me.
Thus I was engrossed. Until...
Two employees came up to see what had caught my attention. As soon as they noticed it was a list of rules, one of them uttered, "Leave it to the HR guy to be attracted to a list of rules."
"I can't help it," I replied and all three of us busted out laughing.
I repeated the story to a couple of other employees later at lunch. Again, much laughter.
I'm glad that my employees can joke with me about being the guy who's attracted to rules.
I'm also glad there is no rule that says, "I can't laugh along with them."
HR and the Bruises Left Behind
I hate having blood drawn. Unfortunately to maintain good health (checking cholesterol, sugar, etc.) and for some medical procedures it is necessary on occasion for a needle to be jabbed into my arm.
Even though I'm middle-aged, my veins have never grown larger than a baby's. Plus they're slippery suckers that challenge any phlebotomist. Thus to nail these suckers, baby needles are a necessity.
Also since I'm middle-aged, I know this. Through experience, I know using baby needles is the best method to get in and get out as quickly and as painlessly as possible.
Inevitably though, one of three scenarios will unfold when I have blood drawn.
As I watched the color of my arm turn yellow, green, and purple this week, I kick myself for letting scenario #3 occur. I could have prevented it. Instead, I decided to trust a trained professional. I trusted them to know my body better than I did.
In my defense though, I tire of the conversations with people in service positions that insist they know what's best for me. They talk over me. They scold. They resent attempts on my part to express my needs. They test my patience and in my weaker moments, I let them rue the moment. Even then, I wish they would be better listeners.
There's great value in listening. A lot can be learned when your brain is focused solely on what the ears are doing. Only then can one hope to get as close as possible to what is occurring in someone else's brain and body. Still, this approach towards empathy is just a cognitive belief of identifying with another's feelings and attitudes. No one can read someone else's mind or feel exactly what they are feeling.
We try as humans to do so. We try as HR professionals to do so. However, this is where HR can make its biggest mistakes. HR are the great listeners. HR are the great empathizers. In fact, they are trained professionals in both. (Or should be). But with this great skill comes great responsibilities.
For HR, those responsibilities are...
Even though I'm middle-aged, my veins have never grown larger than a baby's. Plus they're slippery suckers that challenge any phlebotomist. Thus to nail these suckers, baby needles are a necessity.
Also since I'm middle-aged, I know this. Through experience, I know using baby needles is the best method to get in and get out as quickly and as painlessly as possible.
Inevitably though, one of three scenarios will unfold when I have blood drawn.
- I will mention to the phlebotomist that I have small, slippery veins. The person takes heed, uses the right size needle, and carefully hits the vein on the first try.
- I will mention the same thing to the phlebotomist and they spout back that they're an experienced professional. They claim to be able to handle the job and they use whatever needle they want. Hence, the vein slips away and I have to be jabbed three to four times before they hit paydirt. The bruise they leave behind, like the one I got a week ago, sticks around for quite awhile.
- The third scenario is my fault. I will say nothing because I won't feel like tempting fate that my phlebotomist will be pompous and unyielding or I won't feel like having an argument in the doctor's office. Hence, I end up with a bruise like the one below.
As I watched the color of my arm turn yellow, green, and purple this week, I kick myself for letting scenario #3 occur. I could have prevented it. Instead, I decided to trust a trained professional. I trusted them to know my body better than I did.
In my defense though, I tire of the conversations with people in service positions that insist they know what's best for me. They talk over me. They scold. They resent attempts on my part to express my needs. They test my patience and in my weaker moments, I let them rue the moment. Even then, I wish they would be better listeners.
There's great value in listening. A lot can be learned when your brain is focused solely on what the ears are doing. Only then can one hope to get as close as possible to what is occurring in someone else's brain and body. Still, this approach towards empathy is just a cognitive belief of identifying with another's feelings and attitudes. No one can read someone else's mind or feel exactly what they are feeling.
We try as humans to do so. We try as HR professionals to do so. However, this is where HR can make its biggest mistakes. HR are the great listeners. HR are the great empathizers. In fact, they are trained professionals in both. (Or should be). But with this great skill comes great responsibilities.
For HR, those responsibilities are...
- To never believe HR is always right,
- To never believe HR can read minds, and
- To never believe HR knows the minds and bodies of their employees better than their employees do.
Good Guys and Bad Guys
When Frank Roche from KnowHR/iFractal found out I rode my bike in the city, I remember his first question was, "are you one of the good guys, or one of the bad guys?"
The beautiful, yet sad thing, about the question was I knew exactly what he meant, and said, "I'm one of the good guys." The beautiful part was the question was obtuse yet I understood its meaning. The sad part is that I understood what he meant by "bad guys."
The bad guys are the bicyclists who behave as if they have carte blanche to not obey any rules of proper bicycle riding. They show no regard for pedestrians, car drivers, or their fellow bicyclists. They go the wrong way down streets, they zoom around pedestrians on sidewalks, and they will flip you off or swear at you if you say one discouraging thing about their riding habits.
What is even sadder is over 90% of the bicyclists I see behave with a certain degree of "badness." I can't say that about car drivers or pedestrians. Yet if there is one group that complains on the internet and the press more than the others that they are not respected, it is bicyclists. They complain about lack of bike lanes (which they don't use anyway), cars not treating them like lawful vehicles on the road, and that car drivers and pedestrians complain about them. Again, you don't hear this type of howling from car drivers or pedestrians.
This boils down to one simple problem. How do you expect to garner respect, if you don't act respectable?
As many things do, this led me to think about HR and some of the respect issues in this field.
It seems HR is the component of the business world that complains the most about respect. If this is true, perhaps it is because HR doesn't act respectable enough.
If you're responsible for upholding EEO standards, but make derogatory remarks about the opposite gender ...
If you're responsible for strengthening relationships and building trust, but fabricate stories about co-workers in order to create adversarial relationships ...
If you're responsible for creating recognition programs that are designed to enhance employee engagement, but the standards for being recognized are unattainable ...
If any of these non respectable behaviors or their ilk is noticed, then....
Expect not to be respected.
I'm not sure how widespread bad behavior is in HR. But if you're not feeling respected, perhaps it is because you're one of "bad guys" and not one of the "good guys."
The beautiful, yet sad thing, about the question was I knew exactly what he meant, and said, "I'm one of the good guys." The beautiful part was the question was obtuse yet I understood its meaning. The sad part is that I understood what he meant by "bad guys."
The bad guys are the bicyclists who behave as if they have carte blanche to not obey any rules of proper bicycle riding. They show no regard for pedestrians, car drivers, or their fellow bicyclists. They go the wrong way down streets, they zoom around pedestrians on sidewalks, and they will flip you off or swear at you if you say one discouraging thing about their riding habits.
What is even sadder is over 90% of the bicyclists I see behave with a certain degree of "badness." I can't say that about car drivers or pedestrians. Yet if there is one group that complains on the internet and the press more than the others that they are not respected, it is bicyclists. They complain about lack of bike lanes (which they don't use anyway), cars not treating them like lawful vehicles on the road, and that car drivers and pedestrians complain about them. Again, you don't hear this type of howling from car drivers or pedestrians.
This boils down to one simple problem. How do you expect to garner respect, if you don't act respectable?
As many things do, this led me to think about HR and some of the respect issues in this field.
It seems HR is the component of the business world that complains the most about respect. If this is true, perhaps it is because HR doesn't act respectable enough.
If you're responsible for upholding EEO standards, but make derogatory remarks about the opposite gender ...
If you're responsible for strengthening relationships and building trust, but fabricate stories about co-workers in order to create adversarial relationships ...
If you're responsible for creating recognition programs that are designed to enhance employee engagement, but the standards for being recognized are unattainable ...
If any of these non respectable behaviors or their ilk is noticed, then....
Expect not to be respected.
I'm not sure how widespread bad behavior is in HR. But if you're not feeling respected, perhaps it is because you're one of "bad guys" and not one of the "good guys."
HR Tech Conference: They Know Next
Before I go forward and tell you about my love and admiration for the HR Technology Conference and the $500 discount you get for reading my blog, I want to make sure there is no confusion as to where my loyalties lie.
I know I've been spending a lot of time with SHRM Annual Conference lately. But as proof that my fling with SHRM Annual Conference is over, here is the Dear John letter I sent last week.
Dear SHRM Annual Conference,
The last few months have been great. The time we have spent together has been amazing. You have been so kind. You've given me food, shelter and space to express myself as a writer. I cannot thank you enough and I will always remember your generosity.
There's a part of me that believes you've benefited from being with me just as much as I have with you. I've donated hundreds of words to the HR blogosphere singing your praises to anyone who would listen.
I think our relationship of mutual admiration may have led us to fall a little bit in love with each other. Perhaps I'm reading into things too much. But I think if I pressed hard enough, you would admit you loved me. But that is why I have to go.
Like any whirlwind romance, at some point it has to end. Before our relationship turns sour and we end up hating each other in the end, I think we should say good-bye now.
There is only one HR conference that I truly love and that is my first true love, the HR Technology Conference.Breaking up is never easy. But sometimes you have to do what you have to do. SHRM Annual Conference says, "They know next" but after spending a lot of time together, I have to say it feels more like, "They know now."
I know you'll do fine without me. You may even be better off. But I'm sure our paths will cross again someday. Take care.
Sincerely, Welcome To The Occupation
As much I want to be part of "now", there's a bigger part of me that is looking for what is truly "next." This is the main reason I'm returning for a third year in a row to the HR Technology Conference and why if you haven't, you should, even if you're not an HR techie or shopping for an HRIS, etc.
Below are four reasons why I always find "next" at HR Tech.
1) The Technology Piece
There will be a large amount of discussion involving technology. (Duh). This is the place to see live demos of new (and current) software in all aspects that affect our HR lives. In short, this is the place to let your inner HR geek come out to play.
2) A New Perspective of HR
If you want a progressive view of what is occurring in HR, then look to those who are forging ahead with HR software solutions. The complex problems that HR professionals face within the realms of workforce management, benefits, strategic planning, etc. are all scrutinized by the HR technology professionals. Analysis turns into design, then turns into development, and then turns into a product that provides future solutions to modern day problems. At HR Tech, there isn't just discussion about technology. There's discussion about the whole HR ball of wax.
3) Tons of Cool People Under One Roof
The cast of characters that are either presenting or attending are some of the smartest and interesting people in the HR field today. Check out the program yourself if you don't believe me. And of course, I'll be there.
4) $500 Off The Rack Price
This is not a real reason why I find "next". But it sure does help with making the decision to attend. Go to the website: http://www.hrtechnologyconference.com/ to register and enter the discount code PASMUZ11 by September 19 and you're all set.
Some of you may be very uncomfortable, thinking you'd rather avoid getting in the middle of this love triangle between me, SHRM Annual, and HR Tech. I assure you there is no drama and no one will get hurt if you stop what you're doing right now. Click this link to download the program. Or click here to go to the site. Register. Book your flight and hotel. And go. Trust me, you won't regret it.
And if you recognize me in a session, or on the expo floor, or at an after-party, don't hesitate to introduce yourself and say, "You're right. HR Tech does know next." Don't worry I won't tell SHRM Annual Conference that you agree with me. It'll be our little secret.
Ask Me A "Dumb" Question
What is the hardest thing about working in HR?
Is it the long hours?
Is it the endless conversations about the human condition?
Or is it some of the never-ending battles like health care costs and employee engagement that have you at an impasse?
Or is something simpler?
It's funny how the brain works. I can run circles around HR philosophy and strategy. But when it comes to some minute tactical concept, occasionally the brain will shrink into a catatonic state in the corner.
Fortunately when that occurs, the internet is my substitute brain. With just a few keystrokes and a couple of clicks, I'm back to Mr. Smart HR Guy.
But here's the hard part. What happens when the answers on the internet don't lure my brain out of it's dopamine-deficient state?
I sweat. I sweat because I have to do the thing in HR that is harder than anything else for me. I have to reach out to someone who I know has the answer.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not one of those people who has to be the smartest person in the room. But when it's something simple and I think I should know the answer, I think everyone else thinks I should know the answer. Hence, that fear keeps me spending more time searching for answers when I could just pick up the phone, call a couple of people, and tell them I'm dumb.
So yesterday, I decided instead of spending more time spinning my wheels, I was going to face my fear. I had a simple question about recruiting that I thought I knew the answer, but the answer did not completely set well with me. I picked up the phone, called John Nykolaiszyn and Jennifer McClure and told them I was dumb.
Even though they agreed (I jest), I realized after the calls that that wasn't so bad. I didn't feel any less respected. I had more certainty. Plus I finally put my network of people to work for me and that was a great feeling.
I'm not bold enough yet to share with you what the question was. However, I will say this. It wasn't dumb. It was just that I was in unfamiliar HR-territory, I needed a compass, and I didn't want to ask for directions. It just felt dumb.
This was the hardest thing for me about working in HR. I conquered that yesterday.
If it's a hard thing for you in HR too, call me sometime and ask me a "dumb" question. I have a bunch of extra compasses you can have ... for free.
Is it the long hours?
Is it the endless conversations about the human condition?
Or is it some of the never-ending battles like health care costs and employee engagement that have you at an impasse?
Or is something simpler?
It's funny how the brain works. I can run circles around HR philosophy and strategy. But when it comes to some minute tactical concept, occasionally the brain will shrink into a catatonic state in the corner.
Fortunately when that occurs, the internet is my substitute brain. With just a few keystrokes and a couple of clicks, I'm back to Mr. Smart HR Guy.
But here's the hard part. What happens when the answers on the internet don't lure my brain out of it's dopamine-deficient state?
I sweat. I sweat because I have to do the thing in HR that is harder than anything else for me. I have to reach out to someone who I know has the answer.
Don't get me wrong. I'm not one of those people who has to be the smartest person in the room. But when it's something simple and I think I should know the answer, I think everyone else thinks I should know the answer. Hence, that fear keeps me spending more time searching for answers when I could just pick up the phone, call a couple of people, and tell them I'm dumb.
So yesterday, I decided instead of spending more time spinning my wheels, I was going to face my fear. I had a simple question about recruiting that I thought I knew the answer, but the answer did not completely set well with me. I picked up the phone, called John Nykolaiszyn and Jennifer McClure and told them I was dumb.
Even though they agreed (I jest), I realized after the calls that that wasn't so bad. I didn't feel any less respected. I had more certainty. Plus I finally put my network of people to work for me and that was a great feeling.
I'm not bold enough yet to share with you what the question was. However, I will say this. It wasn't dumb. It was just that I was in unfamiliar HR-territory, I needed a compass, and I didn't want to ask for directions. It just felt dumb.
This was the hardest thing for me about working in HR. I conquered that yesterday.
If it's a hard thing for you in HR too, call me sometime and ask me a "dumb" question. I have a bunch of extra compasses you can have ... for free.
SHRM11: Personal Recap
I've posted my thoughts on the sessions I attended...here (Day 1) ...here (Day 2) ...and here (Day 3).
Now let's get down to the nitty-gritty, and let me tell you what I really thought about #SHRM11.
Let's start with the Bad first:
No reason, no rhyme...
1. The Antlers "I Don't Want Love"
2. Echo and The Bunnymen, "Never Stop"
3. Elvis Costello, "Pretty Words"
4. Level 42, "Something About You"
5. The Vogues, "5 O'Clock World"
6. Dead Kennedys, "Viva Las Vegas"
Now let's get down to the nitty-gritty, and let me tell you what I really thought about #SHRM11.
Let's start with the Bad first:
- I hate Las Vegas.
- I hate the Las Vegas airport.
- My hotel looked cheap, was cheap, and the lobby smelled like grease. (I'm confessing the last part so it doesn't look like J. Lee is spreading rumors.)
- The air was so hot outside mixed with the pollution, it felt like my eyeballs were melting.
- No Mike Krupa, Dwane Lay, Shauna Moerke, April Dowling, Bryon Abramowitz, or Mike VanDervort.
- I hated having to walk to the Hilton Hotel for sessions. (I know this complaint is lame. But still.)
- The Expo Hall vendors acted like the extras at a haunted house. (They lunged at you unexpectedly. It was so annoying.)
- I hate Las Vegas. It's the cesspool of humanity disguised as a glitzy...woops, sorry, I already mentioned this. It's just that I really, really hate Vegas.
- ...And I really, really hate the Vegas airport too.
- HR Bloggers were treated like gold. I cannot thank Curtis Midkiff and Jennifer Hughes enough for their incredible hospitality. They kept me happy the entire time with food, coffee, water and spaces to....
- Park myself away from the maddening throng of how many--15,000, 17,000, 18 trillion HR folks. The space in the press room and the social media lounge were perfect. Plus, sitting with all of my blogging friends and colleagues while we wrote, read, listened and talked was intoxicating.
- The SHRM party at Madame Tussaud's Wax Museum. It creeped me out, but it was a good time. This morphed into...
- Riding in a Hummer Limo to Aria for the Monster Party and Natasha Bedingfield Concert.
- Spending quality time with Trish McFarlane, John Nykolaiszyn, Dawn Hrdlica, Gerry Crispin, Lance Haun, Jason Lauritsen, Charlie Judy, Jessica Miller-Merrell, Robin Schooling, Maren Hogan, and Matt Stollack.
- Finally meeting Michael and Kelly Long, Matt Charney, David Kovacovich, John Hollon and Mike Spinale.
- I went to nine sessions and only walked out of one. (I'm a session jumper if I'm unhappy/bored.)
- After David Rock's session, I made haste to the SHRM store, bought his book, and waited in line for him to sign it. I normally wouldn't do that kind of thing. But I was so taken with his presentation, I was an immediate groupie. (I know ... I'm an HR nerd.)
No reason, no rhyme...
1. The Antlers "I Don't Want Love"
2. Echo and The Bunnymen, "Never Stop"
3. Elvis Costello, "Pretty Words"
4. Level 42, "Something About You"
5. The Vogues, "5 O'Clock World"
6. Dead Kennedys, "Viva Las Vegas"
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